Decisions

Feb 14, 2006
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Decisions

Seeing as how its been almost a month since I last posted I suppose it is time for more thoughts and reflections.
The trials and troubles that prompted my last post are still there.They have not been resolved, in fact some have only gotten worse.There've been more lows than highs..and for a while I found myself once again struggling with depression.Now, I am.......not on the mountain top...still in the valley.. but closer to God,and that makes the valley greener and the trials lighter.
Each time I get tired of doing things myself and hand the worry and stress over, and start once again to depend on Him...I wonder why I ever try to do it alone.It's been a gradual realization..but I have come to see that we are often given the wrong impression of the Christian life.It is not a one time deal where we, at some emotional low, surrender totally to God and from then on depend on Him without question. Rather, it is a continual, never ending process of yielding to His control, and dying to self.Let me tell you - that can be hard! :P And so, I see that the reason I so often attempt to do it myself is because at that point I am not willing to yield control.At that moment I more desire my own way than the smile of God.......and that should be a sobering thought.
Yet now, with my focus once again on the right Person the future holds great promise.As the song says I am "kind of homesick for a country, to which I've never been before.No sad goodbyes will there be spoken, for time won't matter anymore."I long for and wish I was already in heaven. But God wants me here now, so I need to turn my attention to serving Him.These are exciting days to be doing that, for 'signs of the times are appearing everywhere..I can almost hear the trumpet..' and we know that Christ's return is imminent.Aren't you ready for that day??
God has been working in me a lot lately, and bringing enthusiastic people into my life to stir me up and get me motivated.Sometimes, all the trouble and misery I see in the world can get discouraging.It makes me feel like any effort is wasted, so I give up.Then God comes along and gives me a wake up call.He tells me I'm His child and I need to get busy doing what He's commanded me to do.
Right now I am having to make a lot of decisions about the future and what direction I should take.I only want to seek and know clearly what His will is for my life.I want to set myself to getting closer to God, that I would be able to discern what He wants and not choose the wrong thing.In the next few months I will have had to decide..and then take the leap of faith and trust and just go!
Our God is an awesome God, and there is nothing better than serving Him in whatever capacity He has placed us.